077: Volunteer Issues Are Almost Always Leadership Issues | Becoming Series Part 1

077: Volunteer Issues Are Almost Always Leadership Issues | Becoming Series Part 1

Laurie Graham 0:01
Hey, this is Laurie Graham. Welcome to the Small Church Ministry Podcast.

Laurie Graham 0:15
Hey, welcome back to the Small Church Ministry Podcast with practical strategies that work with smaller numbers and smaller budgets. I’ve thought about doing this next series for a little while, but honestly, I didn’t want anybody to hate me, because I’m pretty sure I might step on a few toes. But this is so important that I think, we’ll no, I know that it’s worth the risk. You see, we’ve been walking alongside small churches for a few years now producing resources, running conferences and doing lots of ministry coaching. I consistently speak about developing volunteers and setting them up to succeed. However, as much as we’ve talked about how to get volunteers, develop them, and train them, I haven’t gone as deep onto what to do with existing volunteer issues. It’s very different to start from scratch from a clean slate, than it is to work with an existing culture, a way we’ve always done it or to make improvements or changes. And today, I want to go there.

This is the first in a series about volunteers, that’s going to go a little deeper into how our beliefs and values influence our experience with volunteers, and thus our results. We’re also going to talk a lot about what our personal responsibility really is. This series is going to specifically address the three most common issues or complaints that many people have about volunteers, and how to turn those same struggles into success. We’re going to talk about a few beliefs that are absolutely essential if you want to see your church growing in health, unity, and impact. And we’re going to talk about specific strategies that you can put into place immediately to make some changes. In today’s episode, we’re starting with the biggest mistake that leads to failure before we even get out of the gate, because without this belief set, or maybe it’s a mindset shift that you’ll need to make, but without it, you will not be able to move forward in a healthy volunteer culture. It’s that essential. If you want to be part of the solution in developing volunteers, this is absolutely where it starts.

Laurie Graham 1:10
By the end of today’s episode, you’ll be able to identify if this one thing has crept into your thinking, as well as a few practical actions to take to help a new belief start taking root in your church to when it comes to volunteer issues, one of the biggest obstacles is that we give our power away, and we don’t even know it. We state something that we believe as a fact and it ends up robbing our hope, our creativity, and really leaving us victims. So, have you heard any of these complaints in your church? We don’t have enough volunteers. Our volunteers aren’t committed. They’re not showing up. They’ll come if I’m desperate, but they don’t want to be part of our regular team, or no one’s willing to come to trainings. Have you said any of these things out loud? Have you thought them? My next question is, is how often you’ve heard these repeated, whether it’s in your own mind, with your friends, in your church, or what about in a Facebook community? Ouch. It’s really terribly depressing when we believe these things that we have no power over. Like we have no influence, like, our fate is wrapped up in their response, that we have no ability or capacity to work towards solution. Because here’s the thing, it’s not really true.

Our problems, our struggles, our frustrations are not wrapped up in them. So hang with me, like no one of us is a victim. None of us are without influence or choice. We don’t really get to blame everyone else for our problems. I mean, we certainly can choose to and honestly, it’s easier. It gets us off the hook, but it’s not true. It’s so much easier to say it’s not my fault if they don’t show up. I totally get it, because if it’s not our fault, if it’s all them, well, then I have nothing to change, nothing to do. I don’t have to do any work. I can throw my hands up and say, not me, not my responsibility because I’m doing my part. They’re just not doing theirs. Do you kind of hear the blame game? Now, there’s a few reasons we get stuck in blame. Number one is it is so much easier to blame them. As I mentioned, it gets us off the hook. We don’t need to look at ourselves. We don’t need to examine our motives or our actions or the ways we might actually be hurting people or not loving them fully.

Laurie Graham 4:42
But the second reason that we get stuck in the blame game, I think is even more important because one of the reasons we get stuck in blaming them is because a lot of us have no idea how influential we really can be. So many people have no idea that they’re called to be light and to have influence. Many people don’t know that most volunteer issues really are leadership issues. And that’s what I want to shine a light on today about how much influence you really can have. But before I talk about your amazing influence, let’s just talk about what happens when we do blame others. First off, it honestly doesn’t feel really good. When we blame others, it’s not like a happy positive feeling, and this is why. It’s because it leaves us feeling like victims, like we’re powerless, like this is something that we’re stuck with, because we’re just blaming them, and this also grows negative feelings toward them. It’s not good for our relationships when we blame others.

The other thing that happens when we blame others is, as I mentioned, we’re giving away our power to change anything. If other people have that much power, then my influence is gone. My creativity, there’s no more growth, there’s nothing that my effort can do. And that’s when we stop trying, and we kind of end up in defeat, but here, really, is the truth. Volunteer issues are almost always leadership issues. Yep, I said it. And let’s say it again. Volunteer issues are almost always leadership issues. Now, does that sound like good news to you or bad news? Because if volunteer issues are almost always leadership issues, that means that we all have influence. Now, my goal is not to shame you if you’re the leader, and your volunteers aren’t performing like you wish. My goal is also not to shame your pastor, as though they are responsible for all the choices of all the individuals. My goal is to remind you of your influence, and to bring awareness to the power that you have, and to share the incredible news that you and I, we’re not victims.

Laurie Graham 7:02
Now, if you’re listening in and you don’t consider yourself a leader, this series is still for you because I’m going to show you what you are responsible for, what we are responsible, because all of us, honestly, are only 100% responsible for ourselves, but I’m also going to show you how growing as a leader is going to impact your entire church and the volunteerism that happens there. Yes, just you growing in leadership is going to impact your entire church, even if you are “just” a volunteer, and I say that with air quotes, because I don’t even believe “just” is applicable in small churches at all. Or what about if you’re “just” a Sunday school teacher, or you’re not on staff, or you’re not the pastor? Here’s the thing. Responsibility is contagious. Motivation is contagious. Success is contagious. Personal growth is contagious. It does not have to come from the top down, it can come from the middle, it can come from the bottom, it can come from the top. But wherever these come in, they are contagious. There are practical leadership skills that you can learn that will impact your ministry area, and, if you’re the pastor, the whole church, even on a larger scale.

So whether you don’t have enough volunteers, whether they’re not coming or you don’t have them, or they’re not showing up, or whether your volunteers are burnt out, maybe too few people are doing too much, or you just don’t have that many, or if your volunteers aren’t happy, like they won’t get with the program, or they’re anti-change, or there’s conflict or no unit, unity, or no support of the vision. No matter which of those things you’re struggling with or you just want to improve, we’re going to walk through your responsibility to influence what’s in your power and what you can do about it. So moving forward, instead of fatalistically labeling your volunteers as blank, as non existent, or non committed, or whatever name you give to volunteers who are frustrating you, let’s get a little curious instead and grow in some skills and be part of the solution. Like doesn’t that sound better? I just want to say it again. Volunteer issues are almost always leadership issues.

Laurie Graham 9:22
Now, I’m not saying that volunteers have no responsibility, or that they should have no accountability, because I actually believe the opposite of that, but I do believe that 100%, the vast majority of volunteer issues really are leadership issues, and here’s how I know, because I have seen the exact same volunteers respond completely differently to different leaders in different situations, in different commitments. Think of it, a volunteer who doesn’t show up and doesn’t seem committed in one area can be 1,000% responsible and committed in another area of their life or ministry. I have two stories to share, and the first one is about me. So being human, I can share this in my life and with me as an example, because on one hand, I am a crazy, hardworking individual. I’m super committed. I have a view of excellence. I go above and beyond on a regular basis. I love people. I have some mad skills. And yet, I have had a few volunteer experiences where I was the volunteer, when the people in charge have labeled me as irresponsible, because I showed up late, not helpful, because I didn’t do what I was supposed to do, and uncommitted because I didn’t sign up to help again.

Now, this is me, and I can totally say that the people who labeled me as this could absolutely point to my behavior and make a logical conclusion that would define me as such, but please see that it’s not the whole me, and what was the context? What was really going on in someone’s life? How is somebody else interpreting your actions, your roles, and vice versa? Like who’s coming into your space with what on their mind, on their hearts, in their lives? Now, I also want to say I am not an exception. It’s not that I’m so amazing that I’m so shocked that people could label me like this. I’m not. What I’m saying is everyone is so amazing that we should never add labels to them, like uncommitted, irresponsible, not helpful. Please, let me say that again. I am saying that I am not the exception. I believe that everyone is so amazing that we should never add character labels to them, or label them unworthy of our time. Very rarely, is there a person who’s not committed to anything. Some people are committed to work, to family, to hobbies, to video games, to sports, to their home businesses. So yes, maybe there’s competing priorities, but here’s the good news. People aren’t lame. They’re not lazy. They’re not incapable, and they don’t all lack character.

Laurie Graham 12:17
We all were created with much to give. Every human has much to offer. And yes, none of us are perfect, but we are all on the journey. We all can grow. We all have great stuff in us. And this is why I have to say that volunteer issues are almost always leadership issues. As leaders, as people, we can grow in skills. A leader with skills, well, they tend to have a lot different results with the exact same volunteers. So why is that? I want to just let you know right away, it’s not rocket science. There are very simple skills that you can learn and practice and develop, and you can be a total rockstar in leading volunteers, in encouraging them, in finding them and developing them. You really can do it. I know it because I’ve seen it. Which leads me to the second story I want to share. And it comes from Nancy, who is a member in the Small Church Academy. Just a few weeks ago, Nancy sent me an email, and I’m gonna give you some of the highlights.

She was sharing her experience in the Academy and she said I joined the Academy back in March, and at that time, I was setting up VBS and Arts Camp for the summer. I used a simple suggestion that I should look at folks who don’t normally involve themselves in children’s ministry. So I asked around and I discovered a man who used to lead outreach missions, and has the tools and know how to build props and such. She said his face lit up when I asked for his help. Just by doing a little checking around, I discovered a wealth of people who had needed skills and were willing to help, but they couldn’t commit for the entire week. Then she said, by the middle of May, for a VBS in July, I had all the full-week leaders and assistants that I needed. I also had people scheduled for props, for setup day, for teardown day. I only have one open spot for support and I have someone considering it even now. I even have extra floaters if needed! She went on to say that she asked youth to serve on the VBS praise band and they’re learning songs and skits right now. The children, grades one through six are spending the month of June helping me make decorations and props for VBS, while I lead children’s worship with the lessons focused on friendship and helping others. This has also had the added benefit of giving my children’s worship team a month off.

Laurie Graham 14:49
Do you see all the coolness in here? Nancy went on to say, retirees came from nearly every class to offer help when they saw how things were organized and that there were jobs that could be only once a week, instead of every single day. Then Nancy said this, the major change that she made to her process was sharing her plan via PowerPoint with anyone who wanted a copy. I had all crafts detailed, all games explained, mission focus identified, floor plan layout, decorations defined, and of course, the donation list. She said this, she said, although I always plan in that member, I would never have thought to share that level of detail, but when church members saw exactly what was going to happen, and what was expected, they signed up for what they could do. As an added bonus, the church is excited about VBS this year, not complaining about being asked to help. Okay, end of Nancy’s email.

Can I just say, this is such a common struggle having enough volunteers. Now, whether it’s VBS, an outreach event, you know, all church, Sunday school, whatever it is, as you hear the changes that Nancy made, I want to point out that she didn’t find a new church with new people. She made a few changes on her end, and the result was amazing. No, she didn’t have to make any changes. She could have done the same thing that most of our churches do. We complain about volunteers, we use the same ones who always serve, we burn up people who are already doing too much, and we do more ourselves because other people won’t show up. We can call on the people who are willing, but not excited, but this is not what Nancy did. She made some little changes in the way she led, the way she invited. And I don’t know if you caught the end of her email, but she said As an added bonus, the church is excited about VBS this year, not complaining about being asked to help. That is gold. Do you see that shift in church culture? Now, this does not happen if you’re blaming volunteers. If you don’t take responsibility for changing your leadership, nothing would change.

Laurie Graham 16:54
But instead of complaining about the same old thing, the same old way that could have resulted in the same old thing, Nancy made some tweaks. She asked unlikely people, she made it easier to serve, she looked beyond the typical what people could do, where they could do less, she shared her plan. And by the way, sharing that plan, basically, does what I’ve talked about before, which elevates people from servants to friends. We’re going to share what we’re doing, we’re not just going to say hey, come do this. You’re going to be part of the bigger vision. Now that story may or may not relate to your specific challenges with volunteers, but I bet it hits a few, and I think it illustrates so well how much our growing in leadership can influence the results in ministry, how small tweaks can change our outcome. How Nancy making changes influenced the results, not just in VBS, but in her church, church wide.

So could you consider that saying, we don’t have volunteers, our volunteers aren’t committed, nobody’s willing to help, could you consider that saying those things is not only defeating, but might be untrue? When we repeat these things to ourselves as though they are true, something happens in our hearts, when we say that no one is open to change, when we say that no one is committed, when we blame others, can you see how blaming other people doesn’t really serve us at all? Now, this is just not the kind of disciples that we were called to be. Jesus didn’t example powerlessness or blaming or a victim mentality, Old Testament, New Testament, nowhere throughout church history because what it call, what God calls us to do is move and grow and influence. Like, isn’t that great news, that we do have influence? You are not a victim of doing too much, or overworking, or stress, or pressure because others aren’t doing what you wish they were doing. You are not a victim.

Laurie Graham 18:59
You have so much choice and God-led, you can totally move into doing what He has for you in a new way and in a fresh way. And your beliefs about your own influence affect our thoughts and our actions and our feelings just as much as our belief that we hold toward volunteers. Because if you don’t believe you have influence, if you don’t believe you have a power to change anything, if you’re feeling like a victim, you will not see the changes that you’re dreaming of for your church or ministry. You really won’t. So this is where we’re starting today. You are not a victim, and you can do things that will make a change. You’re growing in leadership, skills, abilities, beliefs, mindsets. It will influence your ministry and your church. Like can you believe that God has something more for you, like for you, as a person of influence? Can you commit to changing your mindset from blaming, to becoming, to becoming a better leader, and watching what God will do with that?

Whether you are a leadership rockstar or you don’t even consider yourself a leader, like maybe you’re kind of even allergic to the term, I want you to hang with me because none of us have arrived into all that God has for us. People who grow as leaders, like people who are really growing, we tend to kind of be almost addicted to growing like, we know we’ve never arrived. And in fact, the more we arrive, the more we realize we haven’t arrived. So once you like latch onto this becoming, this shift from blaming to becoming, it doesn’t end you never get to a place where you don’t want to grow anymore. Because the more we grow, and we realize what God has for us, the more we want more of what God has for us. Because there is more, and it doesn’t start with them. It starts with you, it starts with me.

Laurie Graham 21:13
So before next week, consider this, that God has not given you a spirit of cowardice, or timidity, or resignation, or defeat. He has not created you a victim, and I hope this pops to mind all week long. He has not given you a spirit of resignation, or defeat, or timidity, but He’s given you a spirit of love and power and a sound mind. So let’s use that sound mind! If you’ve been caught in the blame game at all, saying things like, if only they would step up, if they would do our part, I wouldn’t have to do so much, blaming others for not being present, for not being committed, for not grabbing onto new ideas or not embracing change, if you catch this coming to mind at all, would you please also catch it in your heart? Like, take a breath, and whether or not you believe it’s true, because sometimes it takes a while to shift our beliefs, but whether or not you believe it’s true, that it’s their fault, whether or not you believe it’s true, would you just consider how much that statement or belief is holding you back? How much of your influence it takes away, how much, how it interrupts your hope, how it cancels out your own creativity? Because if it’s all their fault, man, it’s not worth our effort or time, if it’s all their fault, but if we can do something, if we can become a better leader, and watch our churches change, something very different happens in our mind, our heart, and our spirit.

Because thinking statements of blame or repeating it or sharing it, it doesn’t serve us, it does no good. It actually takes us further from the hope that we have in Christ. So if you hear someone else say it, someone else complain about a volunteer, or the state of your church, maybe just acknowledge it with uh, yeah, I’m learning about that too, or yeah, it’s really tough when our expectations aren’t met, but then add something else. Like, what might God be calling us to, or where might God be calling us to grow, or how can we switch our hope from them to putting our hope in God? Like whether you hear these statements at home, at church, with your friends, or in a Facebook community, could you be part of influencing that shift to something that’s a bit more God-like and Jesus-centered? This is the biggest shift that absolutely needs to happen if we’re going to be all that God has for us, and see our churches become all that God has for our church. We need to stop blaming, and start becoming.

Laurie Graham 24:11
So from wherever you’re starting to wherever you want to be, we are all on this learning curve together. As always, it would mean the world for me if you would leave a review on the podcast here, your review really helps more people find the hope that they’re looking for in their small churches. And if you’re all in and you’re ready for leadership transformation, come join us in the Small Church Network and Academy. We take concepts like these and we go deeper, and we learn how to apply them into our unique churches and ministry areas, all with support, community and coaching along the way. So visit smallchurchministry.com/network to start your 30-day free trial. And join me next week, right here on the podcast, for part two of this series. Let’s change the results we’re experiencing with volunteers because God has a lot more for all of us. Talk to you next week. Be a light!