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How are you feeling about ministry right now?
I hope you’re feeling fantastic!
But if you’re not, I’ve been there. In fact, if we’re being honest, we all have.
Instead of beating yourself up for losing your passion or (worse yet) pressing through hoping it’ll get better, listen in for practical steps to give your ministry mood a lift.
Perfect for personal application or to share with team members, the seven ideas include a few easy pivots as well as a couple of major shifts.
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Laurie Graham 0:01
Hey, this is Laurie Graham. Welcome to the Small Church Ministry podcast.
Laurie Graham 0:14
Hey, welcome back to another episode of the Small Church Ministry Podcast. You’re in for a fun episode today. Quick, easy, fun, super practical: seven things to do if you’re tired of church ministry. Before I go through the seven, I want to tell you, I have tried every single one of these, and they have all served me at different times in my, gosh, has it already been four decades of serving?
Laurie Graham 0:36
But the other thing I want to mention is if you are tired of church ministry, if it feels like a drag, if you’re getting close to burnout, I just want to say this does not mean there’s something wrong with you. This doesn’t mean you’re not in love with Jesus. This doesn’t mean you lack perseverance, or that you’re lazy, or that you’re not passionate. All it means is you’re just tired of church ministry. It’s time for a new season, or a new skill, or some new friends. And this is very, very normal. If you get tired of church ministry, sometimes it’s really shocking to people because when we first start following the Lord, there is a passion to serve, like we want to do, do, do, oftentimes. And that’s actually part of spiritual stages of just growth and maturity.
And another thing that is normal in church ministry and spiritual growth, is we do go through times when we are tired for a bunch of different reasons, or times of spiritual dryness even. So I’m going to give you seven things to do if you’re tired of church ministry. If you happen to be listening, and you are on fire, and you’re like, “This isn’t for me,” it might not be, but it’s probably for somebody you serve with, for somebody who is at your church, for a friend. So next time you hear somebody say they’re tired of church ministry, here are seven things to do. And I will wrap up the episode with one thing not to do.
Laurie Graham 2:01
Okay, first thing to do: Hang out with hope. Start connecting with people who are having fun in ministry. They do exist. They’re all over our community, whether you’re in our free Facebook community, or in our paid membership, or find people in your city, in your town, in your denomination, who are actually excited and having fun in ministry. Now, why I say this is when we are feeling exhausted, or burnt out, or tired, or cynical, or ministry just feels like a drag, it’s pretty easy to find other people who feel like that, right? Many people who join our community will say, “Oh my gosh, it’s just so refreshing!” Yes, it is totally refreshing. So hang out with people who are having fun in ministry, because they will pull you up instead of pulling you down.
Laurie Graham 2:54
Okay, thing number two. Don’t be shocked here. Find some fun and friends outside of church. Yes, I will say it again. Second thing to do when you’re tired of church ministry is find some fun and friends outside of church. Now, if you’re going to say that you’re too busy in ministry, too busy serving to have fun and friends outside of church, I would like to suggest that that might be part of the problem. Sometimes serving in ministry, as a volunteer when you’re doing all sorts of other things, including jobs and caretaking or what have you, sometimes ministry gets really consuming. It has a way of kind of getting into all the nooks and crannies of our lives. And I’d like to suggest that you put it in a container.
When you’re tired of church ministry, this is one great strategy: put ministry into a little bit of a smaller container, or at least into a container where it’s not oozing into every crevice of your life. And find some fun and friends outside of church. This might look like joining an exercise group like I did, or joining a gardening club, which I did at one point, but that didn’t stick more than a couple years. Or maybe you want to go rock climbing, whatever it would be. Find some fun and friends outside of church. Now, one of the most refreshing things I have found with this is they’re not complaining about the same thing that people in church complain about. It’s actually really refreshing and very fun. It’s even fun to kind of be incognito and people don’t even know your role at your church, or the way that you’ve served in the past because they’re outside of your normal circle.
Laurie Graham 4:36
So my thing number one was hanging out with hope and get connected with people who are having fun in ministry. My Thing number two is to find some fun and friends outside the church.
Laurie Graham 4:47
Okay, thing number three to do when you’re tired of church ministry: Change up the ministry and be creative. Do something new, do something different. One thing that can happen when we’re serving in a position, especially if we’ve been in that position or ministry area for a while, is we have a certain way we like to do it, and it works for you, or you probably wouldn’t still be doing it. It gets mundane and it gets to be rote. And honestly, I don’t think that God has ever been very predictable. So have some fun, be creative and switch it up.
Let’s say you lead a small group, and you always begin with an opening prayer. Or maybe there’s a discussion question and then you facilitate and then there’s something at the end, switch up the order or do something completely different. Open up with Visio Divina, which is kind of like a takeoff of Lectio Divina, where you look at a piece of art and ask people what they see. You can totally Google that and find some really cool ways online. You could open up with a song. Or another way to switch it up is let’s say you teach a regular six-week Bible study or a small group or Sunday school. Why don’t you take four to six weeks off. And instead of studying during that time, just dedicate it to deeper fellowship. So just by switching it up and doing it different, it can actually refresh your ministry. Be creative. Don’t be afraid to take a risk. Don’t be afraid to say, “Hey, we’re going to try this just for fun and just for a season.”
Laurie Graham 6:21
Okay, Thing Number Four to do if you’re tired of church ministry: Learn some new ministry skills. There are so many skills out there that would totally change our ministry. If you, let’s say you teach children Sunday school, maybe learn a new way of positive behavior reinforcement, or maybe learn a new teaching style. Follow Joi Wendling; she has all this kind of very cool stuff and tips for purposeful play. So just learn something new in ministry. If you have been leading a prayer group for a long time, start studying different ways to connect people in prayer, or using prayer in a way that people who don’t think they like to pray or are intimidated by prayer, ways for them to connect.
So this isn’t just changing it up and doing something like the thing number three I mentioned, this is actually learning something brand new that you’ve never learned before. And if you think that there’s nothing new to learn, no ministry skills to learn in your ministry area, I’m going to say that’s part of the problem too. There’s always new ways to do ministry, new skills we haven’t learned, and ways to take our ministry in different directions. So have fun learning some new skills in ministry.
Laurie Graham 7:45
Okay. We’re up to number five. So let me do a little review. The first thing was to hang out with hope and get connected with people having fun in ministry. The Thing number two to do when you’re tired of church ministry is find fun and friends outside of church. So refreshing. Number three, change it up, whatever you’re doing in your ministry, just be a little creative. Try something different. And number four is really investing time and energy into learning some new skills. Along with learning those new skills, you may want to find a different mentor who’s further along in that ministry area, but do something different to bring more excellence into your ministry. That can really enliven things a lot.
Laurie Graham 8:29
Okay, number five, a little out there, but totally cool, is to swap ministry positions with someone. Consider it. Maybe you do the tech ministry at church, and you’re like, “Okay, I’m burnout. I’m exhausted.” But they count on you on Sunday mornings for that tech ministry. What ministry area could you swap with? So that everybody’s counting on people on Sunday morning? And if that’s you, who else is being counted on? And could you just swap areas? Maybe there’s somebody who has been doing cookies and coffee, while you are doing tech? Could you swap those jobs? Could you switch up?
Now if you’re a ministry leader, and you know, you know, your people are tired, this is something you can even help direct. If you’re in charge of the worship team, and you’ve got a guitarist and you’ve got somebody on tech, can you swap them? Can you teach the person on tech some new skills and teach the guitar player new skills to just consider swapping ministry positions with someone? It can be very fun. Even if you are like in charge of a ministry area like outreach? Could you swap positions with the person who’s in charge of the Men’s Ministry?
Laurie Graham 9:43
Let’s say now, it could be totally disastrous. It could be very fun in a disastrous way, like, “Wow, that totally didn’t work.” But I’m going to tell you, just by swapping positions, when you swap back, you just have a whole new fresh take on everything. So that’s my idea number five.
Laurie Graham 10:02
Okay, sixth thing to do if you’re tired of church ministry—so we’re on number six, and I would like you to take a breath and really consider this: Focus on your health. Take some of the priority that you have placed on ministry and put it into your health. It is shocking to me—I paused because I didn’t want to say it’s shocking, I suppose it isn’t shocking, it’s so saddening to me—how many people serving in ministry are not healthy. And I mean physically healthy. No energy, not eating right, struggling with weight issues, just food dependencies. We don’t exercise. Just consider that if this fits you, if you are tired of church ministry, of taking some of that priority and putting it on your body, your physical body.
Even so many people in ministry don’t sleep well, struggling with insomnia, which leads to anxiety, and can lead to depression and so much more. So what if you took some of that emphasis in church ministry, maybe even lessening some of your responsibilities, and focus on your health? There are, you’re going to get paid back from this, I’m telling you. When you have more energy, when you’re sleeping better, when you’re feeling better, even if you’re just in process of feeling better, right? And getting yourself into some new physical routines. It can totally change your outlook on everything in life, including ministry. So consider that.
Laurie Graham 11:44
And then, drumroll please, number seven, thing to do if you are tired of church ministry: You may need to take a break from serving. I said it. You may need to take a break from serving. Now, tired probably doesn’t mean completely burnt out. So why am I telling you you may need to take a break from serving? Because it’s better to take a break now than get yourself to exhaustion. When you start feeling tired of church ministry, honestly, that is one of the stages that heads to burnout. One of the ministry training courses we’re putting together is called Burnout Recovery. And it’s been so fun putting these courses together just to help people in ministry in so many ways. But in Burnout Recovery, one of the concepts we cover in the first course is that when you’re burnt out, it’s not like you just got hit by a bus.
It didn’t happen instantly. Sometimes it feels like that, like, “Oh my gosh, what just happened? I am burnt out.” There are stages to burnout. If you are feeling tired of ministry, lethargic, or just unmotivated, or like, “It’s just the same old, same old,” that is one of the stages that is leading to burnout. So take a break from serving before you get burned out. These seven things are things that will help you stay in ministry longer. They also will help you be in love with Jesus longer and more consistently. So we’re not on such a roller coaster of acting like doing really fast and being on hyperspeed and then pulling back and then pushing through, right? We don’t need to be like that. All these seven things are fabulous to do, even if you’re just starting to feel tired of church ministry.
Laurie Graham 13:43
Now in number seven, when I said take a break from serving, please notice I did not say take a break from church or take a break from community. I firmly believe that God has created us to live in community, not just when we’re happy, not just when we’re serving, not just when things are going well. Sometimes for people who are serving in ministry, especially core people like you—you wouldn’t be listening to this podcast if you weren’t committed to ministry—but one of the things that happens to people like you, like me, like others who are committed to ministry, is when we have struggles going on, we often will isolate ourselves, because we don’t want to influence people negatively. We don’t want to put it on them.
Oftentimes we have a feeling of responsibility, like, “Other people are so busy. I need to help them. They have enough going on. I can handle my own.” And I don’t believe that’s biblical at all. God created us to live in community, to grieve in community, to work through sorrow in community, to work through celebration in community, to work through life in community. So if you are at a place where you’re tired of church ministry, and number seven is something you’re like, “Oh my gosh, that’s probably me, I probably need to take a break from serving.” It doesn’t mean you take a break from church, from community, from people who are around you and supporting you and loving you, even if they don’t understand why you’re taking a break. You can actually help model more health in ministry.
Laurie Graham 15:19
So these are my seven things to do if you’re tired of church ministry. And I told you, I was going to wrap up with one thing not to do. But before I do that, I want to encourage you again: Hang out with hope, connect with people who actually have fun in ministry. They exist. I’m one of them. I know hundreds of them. Okay. Second thing, find some fun and friends outside of church. If you don’t have time to be involved in your community, in clubs, being with people outside of church, there probably is an issue there. Because we were never called to live in this church bubble. It’s like we’re creating these holy huddles, and we forget what life on the outside is like.
One of the things I’ve taken up in the past year is line dancing. And it is so fun, I’m telling you. It was so odd at first, to go by myself to free line dancing lessons that were happening in my community. But at this point, it’s like one of the highlights of my week. Okay? So find something that’s fun, where you can create some friends outside of church. It’s not instant, you may have to try a few different places, a few different hobbies, a few different clubs, a few different hangouts. But you can eventually get there, okay?
Laurie Graham 16:36
The number three was change it up and be creative in the ministry that you’re doing, do something new, do something different. If you’re in worship, try some other genre of songs, try a different way of leading practices. If you’re in Sunday school, try messing up the order or bringing in a new element you haven’t done in a while, even changing up the venue. Like let’s say you typically lead this group, why not lead it outside, or in a restaurant nearby?
So just change something up in what you’re doing, it can provide a really good lift. The fourth thing I mentioned was learning some new ministry skills that apply to what you’re doing. Something happens when we are learning and growing. And I don’t just mean like teaching new Bible knowledge. I mean, new different skills in leading, in facilitating, in event planning, in anything. Just learn some new skills. If you’re in music, pick up a new instrument. Okay, so lots of different ways to learn some new skills.
Laurie Graham 17:39
Number five was swapping ministry positions. I’m laughing even now as I say that, because I remember the—wasn’t there an old show called Wife Swap, and they swapped wives or something. But you really can swap positions, try to find somebody in church who, whether it’s for a month, or a season, just try it and have some fun swapping positions. If you’re in the child area, you can even swap grade levels. Like if you teach the littles, or maybe nursery, check and see if the person who leads youth group would be up for swapping. And you know, you’re going to have to do a little cross-training, but it can be a hoot, okay? And it can really provide just a needed break and some laughter too.
Laurie Graham 18:20
Okay, the sixth thing was to focus on your health, take some of the priority off of the other things you’re doing, and really get healthy. Learn some new sleep hygiene habits, so you sleep better. Eat in a new way, you know, whether that is just going with more raw foods or researching different aspects of your health or things that you’re missing in your own body, like, to function well, focus on your health. And the last thing I mentioned was actually taking a break from serving. Again, not from church, but from serving. That can be short, that can be long, it’s just going to depend on if you’re kind of on the low stages of getting tired and you just want to refresh yourself, or if you’re getting closer to burnout. So those are seven things to do if you’re tired of church ministry.
Laurie Graham 19:08
Now. The thing I’m going to tell you not to do, is the thing that most people do when they’re tired of church ministry. And I want to tell you do not do this. And I’ll tell you why. Most people when they’re getting tired of church ministry, again, think of the personality type, the commitment level of people who are in ministry, who are serving weekly, on a regular basis. Those are the people who get tired of church ministry. They are the committed, they are the few, they are you.
Laurie Graham 19:40
So, the thing not to do when you’re tired of church ministry is to keep doing it, to keep pushing through. That is exactly what will take you on the road to burnout.
Laurie Graham 19:53
When you’re tired of church ministry, consider this: You’re at the back of a brick wall, and you’re beating your head on the wall. And you’re saying, “Ouch, this hurts. This doesn’t feel very good.” But you keep beating your head on the wall, over and over again. “Oh, there must be something wrong with me,” and you keep hitting your head on a wall. Can you imagine doing that?
Laurie Graham 20:18
Those of us in church ministry have a pattern where we give badges to people who serve the longest, who are the biggest martyrs. We’ve got to stop that; it does not make sense.
Laurie Graham 20:30
Now, remember, only one option was really taking a break from actually serving. So I’m not telling you to quit. I’m telling you to do things that change how you are feeling about ministry, how you are experiencing it, whether it’s leveling up your skills or hanging out with people who are having fun. But please do something. Do not sit there and continue to bang your head against the brick wall.
Laurie Graham 20:58
Isn’t it a ludicrous picture? Why do we do that? As though if we just work harder, we’re eventually going to bang our head through that wall. No, sometimes we don’t need to go through the wall. We can have a lot of fun going around it, getting to the other side in a new, creative way. So quit doing what’s not working and start doing things that are.
Laurie Graham 21:23
If you want to continue to be the light of the world, sometimes we need to take a step back and take care of the candle. We need to maybe trim the wick a little bit, put up a little windbreaker to keep the wind from blowing it out. But whatever that is for you, if you’re tired of church ministry, don’t just keep pushing and doing the same thing over and over again that is not working. Try one of these seven things. And we’ll talk to you again next week. Be a light.
Hey, this is Laurie Graham. Welcome to the Small Church Ministry podcast.
Laurie Graham 0:14
Hey, welcome back to another episode of the Small Church Ministry Podcast. You’re in for a fun episode today. Quick, easy, fun, super practical: seven things to do if you’re tired of church ministry. Before I go through the seven, I want to tell you, I have tried every single one of these, and they have all served me at different times in my, gosh, has it already been four decades of serving?
Laurie Graham 0:36
But the other thing I want to mention is if you are tired of church ministry, if it feels like a drag, if you’re getting close to burnout, I just want to say this does not mean there’s something wrong with you. This doesn’t mean you’re not in love with Jesus. This doesn’t mean you lack perseverance, or that you’re lazy, or that you’re not passionate. All it means is you’re just tired of church ministry. It’s time for a new season, or a new skill, or some new friends. And this is very, very normal. If you get tired of church ministry, sometimes it’s really shocking to people because when we first start following the Lord, there is a passion to serve, like we want to do, do, do, oftentimes. And that’s actually part of spiritual stages of just growth and maturity.
And another thing that is normal in church ministry and spiritual growth, is we do go through times when we are tired for a bunch of different reasons, or times of spiritual dryness even. So I’m going to give you seven things to do if you’re tired of church ministry. If you happen to be listening, and you are on fire, and you’re like, “This isn’t for me,” it might not be, but it’s probably for somebody you serve with, for somebody who is at your church, for a friend. So next time you hear somebody say they’re tired of church ministry, here are seven things to do. And I will wrap up the episode with one thing not to do.
Laurie Graham 2:01
Okay, first thing to do: Hang out with hope. Start connecting with people who are having fun in ministry. They do exist. They’re all over our community, whether you’re in our free Facebook community, or in our paid membership, or find people in your city, in your town, in your denomination, who are actually excited and having fun in ministry. Now, why I say this is when we are feeling exhausted, or burnt out, or tired, or cynical, or ministry just feels like a drag, it’s pretty easy to find other people who feel like that, right? Many people who join our community will say, “Oh my gosh, it’s just so refreshing!” Yes, it is totally refreshing. So hang out with people who are having fun in ministry, because they will pull you up instead of pulling you down.
Laurie Graham 2:54
Okay, thing number two. Don’t be shocked here. Find some fun and friends outside of church. Yes, I will say it again. Second thing to do when you’re tired of church ministry is find some fun and friends outside of church. Now, if you’re going to say that you’re too busy in ministry, too busy serving to have fun and friends outside of church, I would like to suggest that that might be part of the problem. Sometimes serving in ministry, as a volunteer when you’re doing all sorts of other things, including jobs and caretaking or what have you, sometimes ministry gets really consuming. It has a way of kind of getting into all the nooks and crannies of our lives. And I’d like to suggest that you put it in a container.
When you’re tired of church ministry, this is one great strategy: put ministry into a little bit of a smaller container, or at least into a container where it’s not oozing into every crevice of your life. And find some fun and friends outside of church. This might look like joining an exercise group like I did, or joining a gardening club, which I did at one point, but that didn’t stick more than a couple years. Or maybe you want to go rock climbing, whatever it would be. Find some fun and friends outside of church. Now, one of the most refreshing things I have found with this is they’re not complaining about the same thing that people in church complain about. It’s actually really refreshing and very fun. It’s even fun to kind of be incognito and people don’t even know your role at your church, or the way that you’ve served in the past because they’re outside of your normal circle.
Laurie Graham 4:36
So my thing number one was hanging out with hope and get connected with people who are having fun in ministry. My Thing number two is to find some fun and friends outside the church.
Laurie Graham 4:47
Okay, thing number three to do when you’re tired of church ministry: Change up the ministry and be creative. Do something new, do something different. One thing that can happen when we’re serving in a position, especially if we’ve been in that position or ministry area for a while, is we have a certain way we like to do it, and it works for you, or you probably wouldn’t still be doing it. It gets mundane and it gets to be rote. And honestly, I don’t think that God has ever been very predictable. So have some fun, be creative and switch it up.
Let’s say you lead a small group, and you always begin with an opening prayer. Or maybe there’s a discussion question and then you facilitate and then there’s something at the end, switch up the order or do something completely different. Open up with Visio Divina, which is kind of like a takeoff of Lectio Divina, where you look at a piece of art and ask people what they see. You can totally Google that and find some really cool ways online. You could open up with a song. Or another way to switch it up is let’s say you teach a regular six-week Bible study or a small group or Sunday school. Why don’t you take four to six weeks off. And instead of studying during that time, just dedicate it to deeper fellowship. So just by switching it up and doing it different, it can actually refresh your ministry. Be creative. Don’t be afraid to take a risk. Don’t be afraid to say, “Hey, we’re going to try this just for fun and just for a season.”
Laurie Graham 6:21
Okay, Thing Number Four to do if you’re tired of church ministry: Learn some new ministry skills. There are so many skills out there that would totally change our ministry. If you, let’s say you teach children Sunday school, maybe learn a new way of positive behavior reinforcement, or maybe learn a new teaching style. Follow Joi Wendling; she has all this kind of very cool stuff and tips for purposeful play. So just learn something new in ministry. If you have been leading a prayer group for a long time, start studying different ways to connect people in prayer, or using prayer in a way that people who don’t think they like to pray or are intimidated by prayer, ways for them to connect.
So this isn’t just changing it up and doing something like the thing number three I mentioned, this is actually learning something brand new that you’ve never learned before. And if you think that there’s nothing new to learn, no ministry skills to learn in your ministry area, I’m going to say that’s part of the problem too. There’s always new ways to do ministry, new skills we haven’t learned, and ways to take our ministry in different directions. So have fun learning some new skills in ministry.
Laurie Graham 7:45
Okay. We’re up to number five. So let me do a little review. The first thing was to hang out with hope and get connected with people having fun in ministry. The Thing number two to do when you’re tired of church ministry is find fun and friends outside of church. So refreshing. Number three, change it up, whatever you’re doing in your ministry, just be a little creative. Try something different. And number four is really investing time and energy into learning some new skills. Along with learning those new skills, you may want to find a different mentor who’s further along in that ministry area, but do something different to bring more excellence into your ministry. That can really enliven things a lot.
Laurie Graham 8:29
Okay, number five, a little out there, but totally cool, is to swap ministry positions with someone. Consider it. Maybe you do the tech ministry at church, and you’re like, “Okay, I’m burnout. I’m exhausted.” But they count on you on Sunday mornings for that tech ministry. What ministry area could you swap with? So that everybody’s counting on people on Sunday morning? And if that’s you, who else is being counted on? And could you just swap areas? Maybe there’s somebody who has been doing cookies and coffee, while you are doing tech? Could you swap those jobs? Could you switch up?
Now if you’re a ministry leader, and you know, you know, your people are tired, this is something you can even help direct. If you’re in charge of the worship team, and you’ve got a guitarist and you’ve got somebody on tech, can you swap them? Can you teach the person on tech some new skills and teach the guitar player new skills to just consider swapping ministry positions with someone? It can be very fun. Even if you are like in charge of a ministry area like outreach? Could you swap positions with the person who’s in charge of the Men’s Ministry?
Laurie Graham 9:43
Let’s say now, it could be totally disastrous. It could be very fun in a disastrous way, like, “Wow, that totally didn’t work.” But I’m going to tell you, just by swapping positions, when you swap back, you just have a whole new fresh take on everything. So that’s my idea number five.
Laurie Graham 10:02
Okay, sixth thing to do if you’re tired of church ministry—so we’re on number six, and I would like you to take a breath and really consider this: Focus on your health. Take some of the priority that you have placed on ministry and put it into your health. It is shocking to me—I paused because I didn’t want to say it’s shocking, I suppose it isn’t shocking, it’s so saddening to me—how many people serving in ministry are not healthy. And I mean physically healthy. No energy, not eating right, struggling with weight issues, just food dependencies. We don’t exercise. Just consider that if this fits you, if you are tired of church ministry, of taking some of that priority and putting it on your body, your physical body.
Even so many people in ministry don’t sleep well, struggling with insomnia, which leads to anxiety, and can lead to depression and so much more. So what if you took some of that emphasis in church ministry, maybe even lessening some of your responsibilities, and focus on your health? There are, you’re going to get paid back from this, I’m telling you. When you have more energy, when you’re sleeping better, when you’re feeling better, even if you’re just in process of feeling better, right? And getting yourself into some new physical routines. It can totally change your outlook on everything in life, including ministry. So consider that.
Laurie Graham 11:44
And then, drumroll please, number seven, thing to do if you are tired of church ministry: You may need to take a break from serving. I said it. You may need to take a break from serving. Now, tired probably doesn’t mean completely burnt out. So why am I telling you you may need to take a break from serving? Because it’s better to take a break now than get yourself to exhaustion. When you start feeling tired of church ministry, honestly, that is one of the stages that heads to burnout. One of the ministry training courses we’re putting together is called Burnout Recovery. And it’s been so fun putting these courses together just to help people in ministry in so many ways. But in Burnout Recovery, one of the concepts we cover in the first course is that when you’re burnt out, it’s not like you just got hit by a bus.
It didn’t happen instantly. Sometimes it feels like that, like, “Oh my gosh, what just happened? I am burnt out.” There are stages to burnout. If you are feeling tired of ministry, lethargic, or just unmotivated, or like, “It’s just the same old, same old,” that is one of the stages that is leading to burnout. So take a break from serving before you get burned out. These seven things are things that will help you stay in ministry longer. They also will help you be in love with Jesus longer and more consistently. So we’re not on such a roller coaster of acting like doing really fast and being on hyperspeed and then pulling back and then pushing through, right? We don’t need to be like that. All these seven things are fabulous to do, even if you’re just starting to feel tired of church ministry.
Laurie Graham 13:43
Now in number seven, when I said take a break from serving, please notice I did not say take a break from church or take a break from community. I firmly believe that God has created us to live in community, not just when we’re happy, not just when we’re serving, not just when things are going well. Sometimes for people who are serving in ministry, especially core people like you—you wouldn’t be listening to this podcast if you weren’t committed to ministry—but one of the things that happens to people like you, like me, like others who are committed to ministry, is when we have struggles going on, we often will isolate ourselves, because we don’t want to influence people negatively. We don’t want to put it on them.
Oftentimes we have a feeling of responsibility, like, “Other people are so busy. I need to help them. They have enough going on. I can handle my own.” And I don’t believe that’s biblical at all. God created us to live in community, to grieve in community, to work through sorrow in community, to work through celebration in community, to work through life in community. So if you are at a place where you’re tired of church ministry, and number seven is something you’re like, “Oh my gosh, that’s probably me, I probably need to take a break from serving.” It doesn’t mean you take a break from church, from community, from people who are around you and supporting you and loving you, even if they don’t understand why you’re taking a break. You can actually help model more health in ministry.
Laurie Graham 15:19
So these are my seven things to do if you’re tired of church ministry. And I told you, I was going to wrap up with one thing not to do. But before I do that, I want to encourage you again: Hang out with hope, connect with people who actually have fun in ministry. They exist. I’m one of them. I know hundreds of them. Okay. Second thing, find some fun and friends outside of church. If you don’t have time to be involved in your community, in clubs, being with people outside of church, there probably is an issue there. Because we were never called to live in this church bubble. It’s like we’re creating these holy huddles, and we forget what life on the outside is like.
One of the things I’ve taken up in the past year is line dancing. And it is so fun, I’m telling you. It was so odd at first, to go by myself to free line dancing lessons that were happening in my community. But at this point, it’s like one of the highlights of my week. Okay? So find something that’s fun, where you can create some friends outside of church. It’s not instant, you may have to try a few different places, a few different hobbies, a few different clubs, a few different hangouts. But you can eventually get there, okay?
Laurie Graham 16:36
The number three was change it up and be creative in the ministry that you’re doing, do something new, do something different. If you’re in worship, try some other genre of songs, try a different way of leading practices. If you’re in Sunday school, try messing up the order or bringing in a new element you haven’t done in a while, even changing up the venue. Like let’s say you typically lead this group, why not lead it outside, or in a restaurant nearby?
So just change something up in what you’re doing, it can provide a really good lift. The fourth thing I mentioned was learning some new ministry skills that apply to what you’re doing. Something happens when we are learning and growing. And I don’t just mean like teaching new Bible knowledge. I mean, new different skills in leading, in facilitating, in event planning, in anything. Just learn some new skills. If you’re in music, pick up a new instrument. Okay, so lots of different ways to learn some new skills.
Laurie Graham 17:39
Number five was swapping ministry positions. I’m laughing even now as I say that, because I remember the—wasn’t there an old show called Wife Swap, and they swapped wives or something. But you really can swap positions, try to find somebody in church who, whether it’s for a month, or a season, just try it and have some fun swapping positions. If you’re in the child area, you can even swap grade levels. Like if you teach the littles, or maybe nursery, check and see if the person who leads youth group would be up for swapping. And you know, you’re going to have to do a little cross-training, but it can be a hoot, okay? And it can really provide just a needed break and some laughter too.
Laurie Graham 18:20
Okay, the sixth thing was to focus on your health, take some of the priority off of the other things you’re doing, and really get healthy. Learn some new sleep hygiene habits, so you sleep better. Eat in a new way, you know, whether that is just going with more raw foods or researching different aspects of your health or things that you’re missing in your own body, like, to function well, focus on your health. And the last thing I mentioned was actually taking a break from serving. Again, not from church, but from serving. That can be short, that can be long, it’s just going to depend on if you’re kind of on the low stages of getting tired and you just want to refresh yourself, or if you’re getting closer to burnout. So those are seven things to do if you’re tired of church ministry.
Laurie Graham 19:08
Now. The thing I’m going to tell you not to do, is the thing that most people do when they’re tired of church ministry. And I want to tell you do not do this. And I’ll tell you why. Most people when they’re getting tired of church ministry, again, think of the personality type, the commitment level of people who are in ministry, who are serving weekly, on a regular basis. Those are the people who get tired of church ministry. They are the committed, they are the few, they are you.
Laurie Graham 19:40
So, the thing not to do when you’re tired of church ministry is to keep doing it, to keep pushing through. That is exactly what will take you on the road to burnout.
Laurie Graham 19:53
When you’re tired of church ministry, consider this: You’re at the back of a brick wall, and you’re beating your head on the wall. And you’re saying, “Ouch, this hurts. This doesn’t feel very good.” But you keep beating your head on the wall, over and over again. “Oh, there must be something wrong with me,” and you keep hitting your head on a wall. Can you imagine doing that?
Laurie Graham 20:18
Those of us in church ministry have a pattern where we give badges to people who serve the longest, who are the biggest martyrs. We’ve got to stop that; it does not make sense.
Laurie Graham 20:30
Now, remember, only one option was really taking a break from actually serving. So I’m not telling you to quit. I’m telling you to do things that change how you are feeling about ministry, how you are experiencing it, whether it’s leveling up your skills or hanging out with people who are having fun. But please do something. Do not sit there and continue to bang your head against the brick wall.
Laurie Graham 20:58
Isn’t it a ludicrous picture? Why do we do that? As though if we just work harder, we’re eventually going to bang our head through that wall. No, sometimes we don’t need to go through the wall. We can have a lot of fun going around it, getting to the other side in a new, creative way. So quit doing what’s not working and start doing things that are.
Laurie Graham 21:23
If you want to continue to be the light of the world, sometimes we need to take a step back and take care of the candle. We need to maybe trim the wick a little bit, put up a little windbreaker to keep the wind from blowing it out. But whatever that is for you, if you’re tired of church ministry, don’t just keep pushing and doing the same thing over and over again that is not working. Try one of these seven things. And we’ll talk to you again next week. Be a light.