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Do you find that each week, there are churchgoers who either come to service late, start in the sanctuary and leave, or see stragglers that hang in the church hallway for service? This may not be a case of rebellious or rule-breaking behavior. Read on with Behavior Analyst Holly to discover why this happens and what you can do about it.
We have all seen it — service has started, and not everyone has moved into the sanctuary. More than a little late, they may never make it at all! You may also notice that someone repeatedly leaves and returns to the service. What is going on?
Organization and structure can be integral to a successful small church ministry. After all, the God we worship is a God of order.
Give Guidance To Help Attendees Get Plugged In
Small church staff and volunteers work hard to create order and structure so that the services are effective and run smoothly. They make good use of volunteer energy and limited resources. So, it can be frustrating if you see attendees not committing to being in the sanctuary for weekly services.
Sometimes People Just Don’t Want To Go
There are times when attendees want to avoid the sanctuary during the service that we should consider addressing.
- Children or teenagers left without supervision who are goofing off may need more guidance from an adult to get plugged in.
- Attendees who are at church to socialize and purposely avoid the service or distract others from attending may need guidance to get plugged in.
- Those who are unfamiliar with church structure or are new to your small church may need guidance to get plugged in.
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In instances like these, it would be acceptable for a leader to check in with these attendees and help identify why they avoid the service and how to get them engaged. Leading with a curious mind rather than a judgmental one is important in these cases!
Someone Might Have A Valid Reason To Leave A Church Service
Other times, there are good reasons why attendees may avoid or have to leave the sanctuary or service.
Start with a curious mind instead of jumping to conclusions. This is helpful in order to avoid making the attendee feel ashamed, embarrassed, or defensive. Be curious. This puts you in a state of mind to understand or solve a problem. Being judgmental or making assumptions pits you against your brother or sister.
Anxiety Can Keep People From Entering The Sanctuary
There are many different kinds of anxiety that may be triggered or made worse by worshipping in a group. Social anxiety, agoraphobia, or generalized anxiety may make being in close proximity with a group of others, with noise or other stimulation that happens during a service, very frightening. If that is the case, leaders in your small church can arrange to chat with those people and find out how to make the service more supportive and inclusive for them, or how they can hear and benefit from the service from a quieter area of the church.
Disabilities Can Impact Attendance
Not all disabilities are visible. Some attendees may have an ‘invisible’ disability such as autism or ADHD that impacts their ability to attend the service in the sanctuary with everyone else. Check out 3 Things Your Small Church Should Know About ADHD.
- Sensory overwhelm with lights, music, microphones, or greetings could be more painful than fun for someone with autism or ADHD.
- Having to remain still and quietly reverent, or try and maintain focus on a sermon in the midst of a group could be very difficult for someone with autism or ADHD.
- Maybe an attendee has hearing loss, and it is difficult to regulate their hearing aids in the sanctuary.
Having a leader approach with a curious mind to understand what boundaries keep those with disabilities out of the sanctuary and how they can be overcome will make for a more inclusive church body.
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Maybe They Have Responsibilities
Many times, I have been that person who left the service or was late, and it was because I had responsibilities or obligations to attend to.
- When my older daughter was young, she would get scared if there were puppets in Sunday school. So, I would have to go get her and calm her or entertain her until the service was over.
- Sometimes, I was ‘on call’ to help in another ministry area and waited in the fellowship hall if needed in order to avoid disrupting the service for others.
- There were times when I was leading an activity or prepping for an after-church activity and I was late to service or had to leave early to fulfill my commitment.
Not everyone who passed through the fellowship hall would know these things about me, and I am grateful that nobody judged me!
Sometimes People Just Need A Break
Sunday mornings or even Wednesday evenings can be busy times for all involved in small church ministry. We don’t always know what someone goes through before they enter the church doors or what is waiting for them once they exit. Ideally, we want worship times to be refreshing for our attendees and to renew their strength for what lies ahead. However, sometimes you just need a chance to be still. Ultimately, where they are during service times is between them and the Lord. A leader approaching with curiosity and compassion could be a listening ear and support for that attendee.
Start With Curiosity & Not Judgment
Regardless of why people are not in service, start with curiosity — not with judgment.
If you notice that there is a common pattern for attendees to avoid or leave service, talk to the leaders of your small church. Prepare to have a curious mindset that is ready to listen and understand. Find out what is keeping attendees from joining the worship services with the church body. Problem-solve to make all feel as welcome and comfortable as possible.
When your church has done all it can do, give grace to yourselves and the attendees who may just need to step out or participate from the fellowship hall.
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