5 Practical Ways To Partner With Parents In Youth Ministry

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For most of us, the reason we got into youth ministry is pretty simple. We want to influence the next generations to follow Jesus. Because of that, it can be intimidating or daunting to include parents as part of our ministry responsibility. For you, partnering with parents in youth ministry might lie anywhere between scary or unnecessary, depending on your perspective. In this blog post, I want to share why it’s actually a very healthy move to partner with parents in youth ministry, as well as a few practical ideas for how to get started.

The Importance Of Partnering With The Parents Of Youth

You might feel that you’re solely qualified to minister to students. Heck, you might not even quite feel confident about that! But even if you’re not a parent yourself yet, you can think back on your own childhood and appreciate the following truth:

Parents are the most powerful force of influence in a child’s life.

Youth ministers are important. Youth groups can be an integral part of faith development for young people. But ultimately, a child learns far more from their parents than they do anyone else. They can’t help it. It’s hard-wired inside of us as humans. So if you want to have a youth ministry that establishes deep roots in the spiritual development of a teenager, aim for your youth ministry to functionally act as a family ministry.

With that as a backdrop, let’s talk about some practical ideas for partnering with parents in youth ministry.

5 Ways To Partner With Parents In Youth Ministry

1. Keep Parents Informed

This isn’t exactly the newest or hottest trend in youth ministry, but it is the number one way to partner with parents by far. If you want parents to buy into what you’re doing in your youth group, establish a systematic and low-maintenance way to keep them informed. 

The longstanding norm for this is a regular email. Every week, two weeks, or month might make the most sense depending on your church’s rhythm, but find a way to send regular emails to parents to keep them up to date on your youth group’s activities and lesson plans.

Beyond email, some other ways to keep parents informed include private social media groups, texting group chats, or even old-school paper handouts. If you go with handing the latter out to students, know that half of your beautiful handouts will end up on the floor before youth group is over. That’s normal. It’s part of the struggle, and it’s why direct-to-parent communications like email or digital groups are more common and effective.

2. Graciously Take Their Side

Partnering with parents means being on their team. As youth leaders, we sometimes want to be on a teenager’s team in their long-suffering struggle against their parents. We love our students, and we recognize that sometimes their parents make mistakes. But we have a unique role as youth ministry leaders. We get to act as a bridge of reconciliation between teenagers and their parents. So rather than taking the students’ side, use your influence with teenagers to help them see their parents’ perspective. 

This doesn’t mean gaslighting students. It doesn’t mean refusing to acknowledge when their parents are wrong. However, adolescents are in a cognitive phase of development where it can be difficult for them to see beyond their own perspective. Acknowledge the wrong, help them process the hurt, and then guide them toward empathy and reconciliation with their parents who are, in many cases, just trying their best.

3. Let Parents Serve

Let me be clear. Some parents should never serve in their kid’s youth group. We’ve all met the helicopter parent who is less interested in serving and more interested in controlling. But there are parents who should absolutely serve within your ministry. Maybe they can serve by providing snacks. It’s possible their means of service is offering up their home as a host home for a gathering. Or maybe serving does mean allowing a parent to become a hands-on youth leader with the students. 

In any case, it’s human nature to be far more bought into something when we get to contribute to it. So invite parents to contribute to your youth ministry. You may occasionally need to fend off the helicopter parent, but the upside is worth the risk.

4. Feed Them Resources

We’ve established that, depending on your life experiences, you may not feel completely qualified to disciple parents. If that’s you, that’s okay. You can still contribute positively to their journey as a Christ-centered parent, and you should. The internet is full of incredible resources for parents, and by simply providing a link in your email to a book or blog post you’ve come across recently, you’re providing opportunities for enrichment without needing to be the expert yourself.

I haven’t written a book on parenting in particular, but I have written an easy-to-read book on what it means to begin seeing life through the lens of the gospel. The book does have a section on parenting, but many of the principles discussed in the book would help any parent become a healthier person–leading to healthier parenting. The book is called Life Through The Lens Of The Gospel (go figure). Feel free to read it and recommend it if you’re looking for a place to start!

5. Make It Personal

There was a time when youth ministry was all about being big. In an increasingly digital world with an increasingly crowded schedule, big is no longer in. Sure, students still love a big crowd, but youth ministry today is more about establishing spaces for real, relational connections. It’s about finding something you can only discover in a hollow form online. Be real. Be small. Be personal. 

If students are feeling the draw toward experiencing something personal, it only makes sense that parents are, too. As adults, we feel the pull of the digital world, too. We feel the way everything is becoming more and more artificial. So if partnering with parents is a priority for you, make your interactions with parents personal.

Be interested in their world beyond their kid’s youth group attendance. Ask how you can pray for them. Text them a funny video every once in a while just for fun. Because you’re part of a small church, you have a leg up on the big churches here. You get to do this well. In fact, it might be more natural for you than for a ministry leader in a much larger church to do this particular facet of family ministry well. 

So lean into your strengths. Get real. Be personal.

Being A Positive Force In Parent’s Lives Too

You got into youth ministry in order to have an influential role in the lives of students. That’s great, and I hope that continues. But you are qualified and capable of being a positive force in the lives of their parents as well. Parents might not need your advice (although they might). They may not be able to give you their time (although they may want to). Parents might rarely read an email (sorry about that). But if you’re willing to adopt a holistic and multifaceted approach, you can be a ministry leader who partners with parents in youth ministry.

Keep them informed. Take their side. Let them serve. Feed them resources. And make it personal. You are qualified and equipped, and your students will be better off for it in the long run!

Read More:

5 Helpful Ways To Start Connecting With The Youth In Church

Build Relationships Within Your Youth Group

Your Guide To Starting A Youth Ministry From Scratch